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In all serious (out of roleplay) I've found myself a new job and currently settling in! I've been on EPOCH a few times However! I'll be on altis again in the new year! I love you all! Remember! I'm a gentlemen, a scholar and big women = big fun!

I am here, but been master 'bating' a while ;)

I am here, but been master 'bating' a while ;)

Oh i hope you're a squirter! One does ponder about explosive chocolate milkshake ;) I have does' bithes lining up for a good ol' smashin!  If you're lucky enough, your arse will end up looking like a hippos yawn!

A bloody good seeing too? I (as well as a few heads of the nobs of the house of lord sandisk) will be parading and prancing around Atheria tonight at about 9pm. There WILL be midgets There WILL be a mass game of spot the phaggitt I look forward to being rapey towards each and every one of you!

Unless you're the child thought to be conceived by Kate middle ton and her Phaggitt of a 'Husband' Prince William, you are no son of mine! I'm Lord SanDisk, a scholar, a gentleman. Although I welcome anyone and everything to the wonderful world of altis heed my warning .... if you like midget...

Lady SanDisk likes it when I go hard inside her. You see, she has a gold plated vagina and we all know gold is the best disperser of heat. I dip my tally wanker in molten gold before going in, keeps her keen. I also like to pretend I'm Rolf Harris tending to a wounded child constantly asking...

Sorry wrong image.

Well, after a week of what I thought would be a break from life in general ... I seem to have ended up in Altis for real. So at first I was like ... quite fancy robbing the bank. Then thaught fuck it, Id do some mo'fo cocaine! Then I saw FirendlyFireGuy posing like the bitch he is...

Leave the trolling to the pros, you're not invited ;)

Then my job here is done ... For now. Lollipops, paedophiles and grasshoppers.

I'm over 9000% in removing name tags! - police force/NHS could get name badges and I'm sure we can start a custom face system. People who have come in contact with me recently should notice my crown and green eyes (same green as the rip in my penis) My professional (Lol) opinion, it would...

There's an old man here called Dante, he is smashing plates on the floor ... I'm going to ask if he is back. ... ... ... He said something Greek, pretty sure it translated too: "I'm not good at COD" translation might be a bit off - he was trying to hand me a plate of fish. We smashed plates...

You look familiar? Oh wait. No you don't, how's it feel to be so insignificant? ;) I've been drinking lots of rum in greece - I have lots of pictures ... I can't believe how much crete looks like altis, little bit of SanDisk has appeared to the locals (don't think they approve) Good day!

Thank you sir - currently on the way to Gatwick off to Greece for a week.

I'm just here for the comments - being a pro RP'er (or an absolute twat) people need to realise it's "Serious roleplay" and rule breaking has "serious consequences" By day I'm a website administrator for sportsbikeshop.co.uk ... by night? A lunatic lord with a fetish for midget hookers and...

I will be vacant from Altis for a duration of 7 Altasian days! I do intent in throwing a castle party when I get back so keep an eye open for that! Remember to feed my Dogs, let the Reverend out now and then, shave friendlyfireguys fuzzy face and make sure mr liability plays spot the phaggott...

Ps. This is not a derp face - I look like this permanently, a fuzzy faced potato. This is your lord ladies and gentlemen. Like an experienced, midget hooker. Suck it up. Good day.

Think the Rev needs a shave ;) he is such a cheeky bastard, normally he has my sticky residue in there somewhere, maybe he has washed it ... cunt.